A day in my life

I missed posting yesterday, because I was laid up in too much pain to move. I had to lay down, because it hurt to bad to sit up. Days like that it would be real easy to lose faith in God. Like anyone else, I have those thoughts of why, why would God let me suffer like this, why me, what did I do to deserve this? And a lot of other thoughts that as a Christian I should not have. Days like this I have to remember a few verses that give me comfort, and direction. I am going to share this with you, because I need to hear it again.
I start with Job, as he was arguing with his "friends" about whether or not he was suffering because of sin, Job says "even if God kills me, I will still trust Him". This tells me that I should not give up. I should not let my faith waver. Then in John 13:7, Jesus tells Peter "You do not understand what I am doing, but in the end you will understand". This should be good enough for me. But, when you are in sever pain, you don't care about what will happen later, you just want to stop hurting NOW. So I look over to Acts 1:7, and again Jesus says "Your not supposed to know, or understand what God is doing". At this point my faith starts to get a little stronger. At least until the next wave of pain hits. This is when He reminds me of what He told Paul, "My grace is sufficient for whatever you are going through". He also tells us that He will never put more on us than we can handle. Just knowing that no matter what I am suffering through, I can handle it, gives me hope. There are times though, that the pain is so bad, I wonder if I can handle it, I wonder if it will kill me. I have prayed that God would kill me, so that I could have peace. Every time it has gotten that bad, after I prayed, I felt the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, come down and sit next to me, and put His arms around me. Almost immediately I went from wanting to die, to having a peace that is describable.
I am then reminded of 2 Cor 3:18, we are told that when the LORD returns, on that glorious day, we will be changed, we will all have perfect bodies just as Jesus does. There will be no more pain, no more suffering. I will finally understand why God has allowed me to go through this. I will look eye to eye with the people that have been blessed because of my suffering, and at that time I know it will not only be ok, but I will be glad to have suffered the things I have. I will tell God thank you, for allowing me to serve you.
I have to pray daily that the next time the pain gets that bad that God will, remind me of these things. That He will not let me forget, and He always does.

Thank you all for your prayers, and if there is not a devotion posted by 8:00-8:30am, you will know that I am having a bad day and need your prayers urgently.